What's going on with me

1) I have strep throat courtesy of my dear son.
2) I spent way too much money today on rugs and other things that I thought I needed to get in order to make my house look more desirable.
3) I have until 4pm tomorrow to have the house ready to be listed, that's when our realtor is coming over.
4) I have strep throat and my house looks like I went out of town and left a house full of frat boys to take care of things.
5) I have a very nice cleaning lady named Rhoda coming over in the morning to clean my house.
6) I've been cleaning all evening in preparation for Rhoda because I am convinced that if I don't she will tell everyone in town that I'm a horrible housekeeper and when I go to Walmart everyone will stare and point at me and whisper.
7) I still think that the world revolves around me.
8) Jack is reading. How is this possible? The days of spelling dirty words is soon to come to an end.
9) We painted Jack's room and took down the Snoopy Sports border that we so lovingly put up when I was pregnant and we couldn't wait to meet him. It's all about Batman and Superman now.
10) My husband cried more than I did, but it was the paint fumes of course.
11) I hate personality theories. I really do. It will prove to be the death of my GPA.
12) I'm skipping out on PTO popcorn sales tomorrow. And I skipped out on the PTO reading program yesterday.
13) I am turning 39 on Monday. I just threw away my fake ID. How the hell am I this close to 40?
14) I look like I'm turning 39 on Monday. Again, how the hell?
15) My husband says I look 18. My husband is cooler than the other side of the pillow. My husband is also quite full of poo.